Hot Online Dating Tips
Once upon a time, people generally met their future spouses when they were in high school. Then came the advent of the practically mandatory four-year college degree and people began putting off marriage until later… and later… and later. Now it isn’t uncommon for people to wait until they’re in their early thirties to get married, if they marry at all. Unfortunately, it is a lot harder to meet people when you aren’t going out to football games and rec-room parties, so… enter the glorious age of online dating.
Because gone are the days when online dating was thought of as strictly for losers (or worse!). The Internet is the ultimate singles’ bar—without the noise, the drunks, and the high cost of all those not-so-happy hours. Nor, thanks to online dating membership sites, do you have to depend on your friends and family to hook you up with people they think would be perfect for you—and who wouldn’t be perfect for, well, anyone, which is why they are still unattached.
But that’s not true of you. You’re savvy and know that online dating makes it possible for you to connect with a lot more people a lot quicker than you could any other way. You’ll find that person who’s perfect for you yourself, thank you very much, Aunt Myrtle. After all, there are plenty of fish in the sea, and online dating is an absolutely wonderful way to weed out the guppies from the sharks.
Because you do need to be cautious when connecting with other singles online. It almost goes without saying that most everyone stretches the truth a little, and it takes some practice to learn what to look out for. Actually, online dating personal ads are a lot like classified employment ads. You know, that ad that says a company’s looking for eager, go-getters is really after people who are willing to work 16 to18 hours a day for low pay and even lower appreciation.
The same is true for lots of online dating ads. Women will most likely fudge a bit about their weight, and guys are likely to add a few inches of, um, height. More serious lies happen, but not as often as you might think. These days, most people are trying to find more than just dates online, they’re looking for long-lasting relationships and use online dating sites to help with their search.
You may have some ho-hum dates that you’ve connected with online before you find the man or woman of your dreams. This isn’t necessarily because there are more ho-hums who are involved in online dating than with conventional dating, but that the pool of dates is much larger for online dating, so you actually date more or at least have chances to date more—and hey, that’s a good thing, right?
Question: What could Match.com, eHarmony, and AdultFriendFinder possibly have in common and why do you care?
Answer: They are all online dating sites designed with a very specific objective and person in mind. Fact is, an amazing number of people sign up to the wrong dating site and wonder why it doesn’t work for them.
eHarmony is intended for people looking for a long-term, serious relationship, A.K.A. “looking for marriage”. AdultFriendFinder is intended for people looking for a casual, and in most cases, a sexual relationship, A.K.A. “not looking for marriage”. Match.com falls somewhere in between, focusing on casual dating that may potentially turn into a long term relationship.
So, if you are looking for a serious relationship, don’t you think it would be a mistake to join AdultFriendFinder? Yes, it may be fun to look around and flirt, etc., but are you really being honest with yourself and with the other members of that site?
There are literally hundreds, even thousands, of dating sites to choose from. How do you know which ones are right for you?
As you begin your search for the best online dating site, you will probably be surprised by the number of options. Online dating services are popping up daily on the internet, making the decision of choosing the “right” service a bit overwhelming.
It’s well worth the extra time to find 2 or 3 dating sites that fit your personality and offer the services that you’re looking for. Narrow down the list of potential online dating sites to your top 3 and then compare them to determine the pros and cons of each one. Pay particular attention to the monthly cost and features offered by each dating site.
While more and more ‘free’ dating sites are becoming available, most sites differentiate between free and paid memberships. In general, most dating sites will let you upload your profile and a few photos, and search through their database of profiles for free (but they may not let you see all of the details). You will most likely have to pay for any additional features.
Once you’ve chosen a few, sign up for each of them. It only takes a little extra time and you’re sure to meet different people on each of the different sites.
Here are some excellent tips for finding a service that will best match your needs:
- Establish a budget. Decide how much money you want to spend, and set a budget. Most online dating websites charge a recurring monthly fee, but there are a few that have a one-time membership fee, and even fewer totally free sites. Determine up front how much you want to spend so that you can narrow your choices and avoid sites that don’t fit in your budget.
- Ask for references. Talk to friends and family to see if they or anyone they know has had a good experience with a particular online dating website. If you don’t know anyone, you can always check out an online dating guide. Just go to your favorite search engine and type in “online dating guide”. You’ll get plenty to choose from.
- Try to choose an online dating service that has been around for a couple of years. The best way to find out how long a website has been around is to go to the website’s “About Us” page where you will learn not only the date the site was started but also the company’s philosophy. Another good source of information is the “FAQ”, or frequently asked questions page on the website.
- Do your research. Take the time to check your favorite search engines for popular dating sites. Try searching terms like “online dating”, “meet someone online”, or “online personals” to generate lists of potential online sites for you.
- Consider specialized or niche sites. Think about any special interests or unique situations that might require a more specialized online dating website. If you are interesting in something specific like Single Parents, Christian Dating, Jewish Dating, Senior Dating, Gay Dating, or Adult Dating, make sure you include those terms in your search (see #4 above).
- Determine the pros and cons of your top picks. Narrow down the list of potential online sites to your top three and compare them to determine pros and cons of each one. Compare them buy cost and features that are interesting to you such as live chat, online video, and number of members on the site.
- Sign up to multiple dating sites. Don’t be afraid to sign-up for multiple websites or change services if you are not satisfied. The goal is to meet new people online and enjoy the process. If a particular site is not meeting your needs, move on before you invest more of your money on a service that isn’t right for you.
- For safety and convenience, look for online dating services that offer onsite messaging and email services. This will allow you to communicate with people using a special email provided by the dating service instead of using your personal email or IM (instant message). You should stay anonymous, at least at first. You wouldn’t walk into a bar with a name and address tag around your neck, would you? It is important, however, to use a valid email address when signing up for your account. Most dating sites give you the option to receive email notification of replies to your personal ad, and some even forward the reply right to your email box. You won’t want to miss these emails! I suggest that you use a free email account, such as Yahoo Mail or Hotmail , to reduce the possibility of spam. Just remember to check your new mailbox!
- Make sure the dating service offers secure payment methods. Also, look at the type of payments accepted (credit card, check, money order, PayPal, etc.) to ensure the options work for you.
- Look for websites that offer free trials. Look for an online dating service that will allow you to browse profiles and photos before you join, or a service that offers a free trial period so you can talk to people that you are interested in meeting before you have to pay. This allows you to fully understand the number and types of potential matches already signed up with the service.
It’s true to say that many younger men, on reaching the age in their lives when pubescence has taken control of their lateral thinking, find themselves fantasizing about older females, often twice their own age and upwards. For example, it’s quite common for a young man, still at school age, testosterone flying everywhere, to have the ‘hots’ for one or more of his female teachers, a neighbor’s wife or even a pal’s mother.
The consensus of opinion reached by many is that the attraction by a young male to a more mature woman is based on the fact that not only does she have experience.. but a working knowledge of the male anatomy, and a sexual prowess not to be discovered so easily in a younger woman his own age.
Although there are exceptions to the rule, in the majority of cases, his secret lusting remains just that, and goes unnoticed by the older female who still regards him as a young student or friend of her son.
Howerever, as the young male grows older, and gains his own level of experience, so his desire for the maturer female wanes, and on reaching middle age, he will frequently have his head ‘turned’ by a much younger woman.
All this is in stark contrast to the attraction patterns noted in the life of the female of the species. Whereas the young girl, on first becoming sexually aware, will hone her intimacy skills on the younger male, yet she will often be less interested in him as she gets older, turning her attention to the more mature men that cross her path. But why is this the case?
The Sugar Daddy Phenomenon, whilst oftentimes the source of amusement for some, can in fact develop into quite a powerful relationship, with loyalty, romance and chivalry being key factors in the union. Many women note that a male around her own age or younger, will not show her the same level of respect, or pay as much attention to detail that his older counterpart will be inclined to display.
It’s a valid point that most women are more mature than men at any given age, and it’s not surprising that by the time she reaches her mid-thirties, she already feels more compatible with a male ten or twenty years her senior, and has left the guys her own age, far behind both mentally and emotionally. Her more mature partner is more equipped to seduce her mind as well as her body. He will be less afraid of displaying public affection, holding her hand or opening doors for her. He will be happy to allow the whole world see how proud he is to be by her side.
Sexually too, although he may not be an athlete between the sheets, he will feel the need to ensure his girl is pleasured well as a priority over seeking to satisfy his own desires. Her younger lover will no doubt give her “the best seventeen seconds she’s ever had”, before raiding her fridge in search of a beer. Whereas in the case of her older lover, the foreplay will begin in the restaurant with witty flirting, eye contact and laughter. Later they will enjoy the afterglow together, the passion may have subsided but the emotion still very much alive.
The term ‘Sugar Daddy’ was first used in the early 1920’s and is described in the WordWeb Dictionary as “A wealthy older male who offers a young person expensive gifts in return for friendship or intimacy”. The ‘sugar’ in this early term alluded to the sweetening role of the gifts, and ‘daddy’ to the age difference between the pair. There is no mention however, of love, romance or indeed a relationship in the dictionary description of the term, yet it is a fact that women are often attracted, even turned on by men of substance or power. Is it so inconceivable then, that a younger woman could find happiness in a relationship with a guy old enough to be her father, who has so much more to offer her than money and gifts?